


So Far Away

by musictomydamagedears



Category: Buzzfeed: Worth It (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Eventual Happy Ending, M/M, Moving to NY, Steven is Running Away From His Feelings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-31
Updated: 2018-05-31
Packaged: 2019-05-16 08:42:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14808042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musictomydamagedears/pseuds/musictomydamagedears
Summary: It wasn’t that Steven was running away, he was just taking the, uh, the necessary precautions for his own mental stability. Yeah. Something like that. Steven Lim was definitely not running away from his own feelings.Based on a prompt on Tumblr where Steven moves to New York because of his feelings for Andrew





	So Far Away

It wasn’t that Steven was running away, he was just taking the, uh, the necessary precautions for his own mental stability. Yeah. Something like that. Steven Lim was definitely not running away from his own feelings.

At least, that was what he told himself as he told J.P. that he was moving. It was what he told himself when he looked for a new apartment in New York, and it was what he told himself when he asked BuzzFeed if he could get a job at their New York office instead. He wasn’t entirely sure if he believed it.

At first he had been able to deny what was happening, because it had been pretty harmless. A couple of glances every now and then, and just a feeling of warmth and happiness whenever they spent time together. Then it became harder, as a couple of glances turned into outright staring, as the warmth and happiness turned into want and need. A want and need for something forbidden.

You see, Steven Lim was a religious man. A man who liked to follow God’s words, and who liked going to church. He wasn’t homophobic, and he had nothing but respect for people who identified as homosexual. It was just that Steven himself couldn’t be gay, he couldn’t. It was wrong. He was supposed to find a nice - preferably Asian, according to his parents – girl, get married, and have kids. He was not supposed to be in love with his coworker who was very much a male.

Andrew was the best and worst thing to ever happen to Steven. There was no one who knew him as well as the other man, and no one who could make him smile as much, no one who appreciated his quirks as much. However, there was no one who could make Steven cry as much. Keep Steven awake all night because of a broken heart. No one.

“So you’re going to Europe, and then you’re just moving?” Andrew stared at him incredulously as he told him the news. Steven bit his lip, nodding. They still had two more episodes of worth it to shoot, and Steven didn’t know if he could go through both of those episodes without spilling the secret to Andrew.

“Yeah, or, I will probably start moving some of my stuff before Europe, but yeah, that’s the plan,” he told the other man, who seemed very confused at the news. Andrew looked at him, inhaled sharply, and got up. Without a word, Andrew stormed off, leaving Steven alone with Adam.

“Maybe you should have told him after we were done shooting?” Adam suggested, and Steven glared up at him, telling him to shut up. “Sorry, man, I don’t know what to say. Good luck? I’ll miss you?”

“Worth it is renewed for another season, it’s not like we’re going to never see each other again,” Steven shrugged, looking down at the plate.

“You should have just told him that you love him, spare us the whole moving to New York thing,” with that, Adam left too. Steven’s eyes widened, and he stuttered out a slight protest, but he realized that the other man had already left.

Andrew had ignored him for a couple of days after he heard the news, which had upset Steven greatly. However, once he stopped ignoring him, Andrew didn’t leave him alone. He always made sure to be nearby, and Steven could have sworn that Andrew was trying to flirt with him. Except for the fact that Andrew wasn’t gay. Andrew didn’t want him like that.

In other words, his last months in LA had been quite horrible to him, and he had to get away. Had to get away from all of the feelings that were getting to his head and confusing him. Steven had never been happier to leave than when he left for Europe, even if he knew that he was leaving a huge part of his life behind. He was leaving Andrew.

Andrew tried calling him several times while in Europe, but Steven never picked up, giving him bullshit excuses like that it cost too much, that his internet connection was poor, or something like that. He couldn’t answer the phone, because he was sure that he would break. Hearing the voice of the man he loved would probably tear him apart, and he didn’t want to do that to himself. He wanted to forget.

Of course, Steven couldn’t ignore him forever. That’s why he sent Andrew a text on his birthday, but he wasn’t surprised when he never received a reply. Maybe it was for the best? That they cut all contact in between filming worth it, and just keep it completely professional on screen? Steven suspected that it was.

Then it was time to fly home, not to LA, but to NY, and Steven was anxious. His new life was about to begin, and he could start putting LA behind him. Putting Andrew and his feelings for said man behind him. He could find a sweet girl and be happy.

When he got to his new apartment, most of his stuff was already in place. He had fixed some of it himself, but most of it had been fixed by friends and some family. Steven sighed and walked inside, frowning as he noticed an envelope on his table.

He opened it up, resisting the urge to just balling it up and throwing it away as he realized whose handwriting that was.

_Steven_   
_You’ve ignored all my calls, and you left without saying goodbye. I really fucking miss you, but don’t worry, I’ve realized that this didn’t mean as much to you as it does to me. I miss your stupid smile, your stupid jokes, and just you in general. If I did anything wrong, I’m sorry, and I’m sorry that I inevitably fell in love with you and was dumb enough to think that you might feel the same way._

_Andrew_

Steven took a shaky breath, before ripping the paper into tiny pieces. The tears fell off his face and onto the paper, creating these wet patches from where his tears hit. He threw all the tiny bits of paper away, sighing to himself. He had to forget Andrew.

That night, as he struggled to fall asleep, it was with thoughts of Andrew on his mind. He realized that he didn’t want to forget him. Didn’t want a cute girl. He just wanted the blond dork that ate way too expensive food with him. Even though it was 3 am in NY, it was only 11pm in LA, so he found his phone, and found Andrew’s contact. He pressed call.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Find me on Tumblr (I take prompts!): @shouldbestevdrew


End file.
